"We all judge each other, but even though we all do it, that's not an excuse." Rachel Hollis--Girl wash your face.2018
I can't even begin to count how many times I know for a fact that I have been judged. Its almost like the saying goes, "If I had a penny for every time (insert your wish), I would never have to work again!" or something along those lines. Let's be honest though, even though we don't want to be in the hot seat of judgement, how many times have we put others there? How many times have we thought that we were better than someone for whatever reasons?
I think back to my high school days. I was never really one of the popular kids growing up, so once I blossomed in areas appealing to the eye, it was a never ending spiral of being wanted. However, it was for all of the wrong reasons, but I digress. I was a cheerleader, dating the football player, hanging out with the "cool kids", but there was still a part of me that wasn't exactly happy with that, because I knew there were so many other more interesting people to be around. So I broke free of the typical cheerleader type and made friends with the different kids.
I firmly believe I did this, because they were the parts of me that I was afraid to share with the rest of the world. The parts of me that I didn't want anyone to know about, because I didn't want to be judged by my peers. I wanted to hide for fear of being the topic of gossip. Which is funny, because once I got pregnant, I was all anyone was talking about! Go figure!
"Judging is still one of the most hurtful spiteful impulses we own..." Rachel Hollis--Girl wash your face.2018
We've all been there, where we are out in public and we see THAT KID! You know the one I speak of, the one that is throwing a fit, crying, screaming, stressing its mother out so bad she looks like she wants to cry. Happened to me yesterday. Walking in to Lowes, I am with the man and see a man and woman walking out of the store with a little boy, maybe around 5 or 6. I hear the woman telling the little boy that if he doesn't start acting right, she was going to take him to the car. I stop and watch this whole scene play out, wanting to step in, when my husband tugs my hand and says,"Mind your business." I swiftly tell him that minding our business is how little kids fall through the cracks, which could be chalked up to either the cop in me or the mother, or maybe both.
He had to remind me that we don't know what was going on. That I have been that mother in the store, calling him at work, because our child was acting a fool and I wanted nothing more than to leave full of embarrassment. Thanks Shaun, for knocking me back a few notches into my lane! It was at that moment, I heard that small voice telling me, "Pray for her, you don't know the full story." After walking around for a bit, I see this same mom, with probably about five other kids, ranging in ages, complete with an adorable baby in a car seat. That was when I got the voice again, being sarcastic saying, "I told you, you had no idea!"
He was right, I had no idea that she had her hands so full. I was so quick to judge what I saw, because now my kids know better than to act a fool in the store. I also only have 3 kids in comparison to her 5 or 7. It also took work to get them that way, which I am sure she is going through. I pray that she finds peace in this crazy time of her life. I pray she rests when she needs it and those kids know what their mother did for them.
I am at a point in life, where I no longer care what others think of me or my choices. I no longer care if others know what happens in my life, because I am being real enough with them, to get their story straight. No, I don't hang my dirty laundry in public, but I am open enough so they never have to wonder why I am the way I am. They can make their own determinations about me and what they decide to do with it, is between them and their god.
"Our judgments keep us from building our tribe... they prohibit us from life affirming friendships" Rachel Hollis--Girl wash your face.2018
I want to build my tribe of good people, strong men and women that will stop judging and just accept others for who they are. All walks of life are welcome here in The Life of Stratton.