Fix this please, no not that way!

Too many times I have been guilty of doing this. I will give something to God and then try to take it right back. I will beg and plead for him to fix what is going wrong in life, then when the going gets tough, I take it right back. I want it fixed the way I want it, when I want it. But that's not how it works, he doesn't work on my time, he does it in his time. If I know that, why do I find it so difficult to leave it where it lies?

"Do not worry about anything..."

Well we all know, specially us women, how difficult it is when we feel like life should be one way, then find out its so not even in the same playing field of what we though it should be. We fuss and fight, scream and cry, throw things (if you're anything like me), and feel like we are giving up. Are we really though? Tell me one woman in the history of time, that has ever actually given up on anything. We go through the tough times and all the while, we hear this voice in the back of our heads, speaking to our hearts, "Do not worry about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving,present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6

Now I am not here to preach at you, take it for what it is, but I am here to tell you what we all know. We all know that we have heard that spoken to our hearts, and for some reason it seems to soothe our souls. Every time I have ever gone through anything, I have always heard that and it has always pulled me through. Be it my upbringing, the years of Bible Quiz tournaments I would participate in, or just the simple fact that there really is someone/something there with me holding my hand through it all, I have carried those words with me.

Throughout this blog, you will see many situations that may be a trigger for some, but it is what made me. It was what taught to me to be strong through it all, but to also let it go and let God fix it. The overall goal is that it speaks to you and that you can hopefully learn sooner, what took me years of trial and error to learn. You have to let it go; Don't ask for it to be fixed, if you are not willing to let him fix it in his time. He knows what you need, even if you think what you want is what you need. He knows the plans he has for you, even when you think you know better.

I remember, what seems like such a short time ago, the nights after my first husband would hit me, I would lay there in bed and beg for God to make it stop. Fix it for me, is what I would demand, but was I doing what he was asking of me? Was I willing to leave it where I placed it in his hands and just trust that he was doing it? He doesn't make bad things happen to us, he allows it to happen in order to see where our trust and faith lie. That was the hardest lesson for me to learn, "he didn't make it happen, he allowed it to happen." Well now, why would one who is so loving and our Creator allow something bad to happen to me? Because he wanted to test my faith in him and to teach me a lesson, quite the same way any other parent does with their child. He will let us learn, in order to bring us back to him.

I will admit, I am not the best or the most religious, but I am spiritual. I do feel that you can worship how you feel suits you best and your church is anywhere you make it, that is between you and your God. Now let me climb off my soap box and get back to the point, are you still allowing your God to fix it? You can do it, but you can't do it alone. We are never fully alone, specially when you have kids! But the lesson is still the same, go all Elsa on that ish and LET IT GO!

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